Sugar High
by Kurai-onii
Summary: Yami, Bakura, and Malik discover sugar. Ra save us all! Random one-shot. Rated for language and psychopaths.


Kurai-onii: I'm in the one-shot mood today so here it is.

-Line-

Yugi and Yami were having a quiet day at home when the trouble started; it all began with a phone call.

_Ring, ring!_

"I'll get it Yami!" Yugi called hoping from the couch and snatching up the phone. "Moshi, Moshi."

"Yugi! It's terrible!"

"Ryou is that you?"

"Yes Marik is here to and we need your help!" The British hikari yelled into the phone.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Malik and Bakura they…Bakura put that down!" A series of loud crashing noises came from the other end of the line_. _"I've got to go Yugi just hurry!"

Yugi hurriedly hung up the phone. "Yami I think Ryou and Marik are in trouble so hurry up we're leaving."

_Later at Ryou's apartment_

Yami and Yugi stood in front of the door to Ryou's apartment. Not even bothering with common courtesy Yami through open the door; they were rather surprised by the sight that met them.

The apartment was trashed; furniture was flipped, the TV was smashed, the fish bowl had a sneaker in it, and worst of all two rampaging yamis wearing pots on their heads while dueling with umbrellas.

"Prepare to die tomb keeper!" Bakura yelled thwacking Malik on the head.

"In your dreams!" Malik gave a battle cry before tackling the white haired yami.

Yugi glanced around searching for Ryou and Marik. He found them huddled in the corner trembling with fear. Yugi darted to them crouching down beside them.

"What happened?" He demanded.

"T-they found…" Marik started.

"Found what?"

"The sugar!"

Yugi gasped in horror, they had purposefully not told their yamis about sugar worried about the horrors that would come from a yami on a sugar high.

"Aibou…what is this white stuff…it tastes good."

Yugi turned around just in time to see Yami down a whole bag of sugar.

"OH RA NOW THERE ARE THREE OF THEM!" The three teens shouted positively terrified.

Yami's eyes grew wide as the sugar took effect; a large smile planted itself on his face and he dropped the empty sugar bag to the floor.

"The pharaoh took our sugar!" Bakura snarled.

"Let's murder him!" Malik yelled.

"You fools could never beat me." Yami put on his cockiest smile.

"Then prove it." Bakura smirked tossing the former pharaoh an umbrella and a strainer for his head.

And the yamis yet again engaged in battle claiming that the victor had the rights to the last bag of sugar.

…

Malik sat on top of Marik trying to bind his hands with rope.

"Malik get off of me!"

"The sugar gods require a sacrifice."

"There's no such thing as a sugar god." Yugi stated as Yami tugged at his shirt like a small child trying to get his mother's attention.

"And things that don't exist don't need sacrifices." Ryou reasoned trying to shove away Bakura who was yanking at Ryou's chin trying to kiss him.

The yamis stopped dead in their tracks glaring daggers at the three.

"KILL THE NON-BELIEVERS!" They chanted together shoving the other two to the ground by Marik.

"I say this is worse than the Wal-Mart mishap." Yugi whimpered.

"We should never buy sugar again." Marik sneered. "Or we could just kill them after this blows over."

"That's if we survive." Ryou yelped as Bakura pounced on him. "Kura what are you doing?"

"Silence non-believer I'm shunning you."

"But you just talked to me."

"SHUN!"

"Stupid git." Ryou whispered.

"How should we sacrifice them?" Yami questioned putting a foot on Yugi's back to keep him down.

"Death by fire!" Malik shouted.

"Death by water!" Bakura screamed.

"Let them go."

They all turned and glared at Yugi. "You're first." They hissed.

"Death by fire it is." Yami smirked. "Get me the weapon."

Malik jumped up and ran out of the room, he ran back in a moment later with Ryou's iron.

_Several hours later_

Yugi was nursing a triangular burn on his ass while Yami got down on his knees and begged for forgiveness.

"I'm sorry aibou that sugar it just made me go crazy."

"Shut up Yami. I was already pissed about how you acted last time we went out. How do you expect me to stop being angry when you just burned my ass with an iron?"

"Why should we forgive you guys?" Marik hissed. "Not only did you burn Yugi, you tried to shove me in the dishwasher, and I'm pretty sure Bakura was trying to rape Ryou."

"But I love Ryou!" Bakura protested.

"Is that why you chased me around my apartment, which **you **trashed, with a kitchen knife yelling for my blood?" Ryou crossed his arms giving Bakura an if-you-cross-me-your-dead glare.

"But we're sorry!" The yamis chirped.

"I think some punishments are in order." Yugi stated shooting Yami a glare. "For starters no sugar. Ever."

"But aibou…"

"And no card games for a month." Marik added.

"That's just cruel." Malik whimpered.

"You have to do all the chores for a year." Ryou snarled.

"A whole year!" Bakura howled in outrage. "Can't I make it up to you in any way Ryou?"

"Clean my apartment and it better be spotless. Also you have to replace everything you broke."

"So I owe you a new dishwasher, iron, TV, vacuum, umbrella, blender, microwave…"

"Bakura there are too many things to name."

"Is there anything else?" Yami asked.

The hikaris looked at each other before smirking. "Replacing all the stuff you broke is gonna be really expensive…" Ryou started.

"It could take months to pay off." Marik added thumping Malik on the head.

"So the final condition is…" Yugi smirked at Yami.

"What is it?"

"You all have to get jobs." They finished together.

"Dear Ra please tell me you're joking?" Yami begged.

"Nope that's the deal Yami take it or leave it."

They whimpered before nodding their heads slowly, and that's how the yamis started working at McDonalds.

-The end-

Kurai-onii: So how was it? Please tell me what you think! Oh by the way the Wal-Mart thing is from my other one-shot '3 Yamis and a Trip to Walmart'. R&R


End file.
